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DESPAIR / DESPERATION
DESTINY --- DETERMINATION
DEVIL'S ADVOCATE --- DIARIES --- DICKENS (CHARLES)

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DESPAIR

see "UNHAPPINESS" for related links
see "DEATH" for related links


There are some vile and contemptible men who, allowing
themselves to be conquered by misfortune, seek a refuge
in death.
--Agathon (c. 448—400 BC)
Athenian tragic poet.

I'm not yet desperate enough to do anything about
the conditions that are making me desperate.
--Ashleigh Brilliant (1933— )
British-born American writer and artist.

I give the fight up: let there be an end,
A privacy, an obscure nook for me.
I want to be forgotten even by God.
--Robert Browning (1812—1889)
English poet.
"Paracelsus" [1835]

Never despair. But if you do, work on in despair.
--Edmund Burke (1729—1797)
Irish-born Whig politician and man of letters.

The Cardinal is at his wit's end—it is
true—that he had not far to go.
--Lord Byron [George Gordon Byron] (1788—1824)
English Romantic poet and satirist.

I alone am left on earth!
To whom nor relative nor blood remains,
No! not a kindred drop that runs in human veins.
--Thomas Campbell (1777—1844)
Scottish poet.
In Samuel Rogers _The Poetical Works of Rogers, Campbell,
J. Montgomery, Lamb, and Kirke White_ [1830], p. 130.

He is the truly courageous man who never desponds.
--Confucius (551—479 B.C.)
K'ung Ch'iu, Chinese philosopher.
In Louis Klopsch _Many Thoughts of Many Minds: A Treasury of Quotations
from the Literature of Every Land_ [1896], p. 67.

Beware of desperate steps. The darkest day,
Live till to-morrow, will have pass'd away.
--William Cowper (1731—1800)
English poet and hymnodist.
_The Needless Alarm_, l. 132
In John Henry Newman
Letters and Correspondence of John Henry Newman
During His Life in the English Church [1903].

There is no despair so absolute as that which comes with the
first moments of our first great sorrow, when we have not yet
known what it is to have suffered and be healed, to have
despaired and to have recovered hope.
--George Eliot [Mary Ann Evans] (1819—1880)
English novelist.
_Adam Bede_ [1859]

A broken heart is a distemper which kills many more than is
generally imagined, and would have a fair title to a place in
the bills of mortality, did it not differ in one instance from all
other diseases, namely, that no physicians can cure it.
--Henry Fielding (1707—1754)
English novelist and dramatist.

In a real dark night of the soul it is always
three o'clock in the morning.
--F. Scott Fitzgerald (1896—1940)
American novelist.
"Handle with Care" in _Esquire_ [March 1936]

Despair is the price one pays for setting
oneself an impossible aim.
--Graham Greene (1904—1991)
English novelist.
_Heart of the Matter_ [1948]

You wallow in the guilt;
you wallow in the pain
You wave it like a flag,
you wear it like a crown
Got your mind in the gutter,
bringin' everybody down
Complain about the present
and blame it on the past
I'd like to find your inner child
and kick its little ass.
Get over it.
--Don Henley (1947— )
American rock musician.

Nil desperandum.
Never despair.
--Horace [Quintus Horatius Flaccus] (65—8 BC)
Roman poet.
_Odes_

The fountain of my heart dried up within me,—
With nought that loved me, and with nought to love,
I stood upon the desert earth alone.
And in that deep and utter agony,
Though then, then even most unfit to die
I fell upon my knees and prayed for death.
--Charles Robert Maturin (1782—1824)
Irish novelist and dramatist.

The best bridge between despair
and hope is a good night's sleep.
--Harry Ruby (1895—1974)
American songwriter and screenwriter.

The tragedy of man is what dies inside himself
while he still lives.
--Albert Schweitzer (1875—1965)
Franco-German theologian, philosopher, and mission doctor.
_The Philosophy Of Civilization_ [1923]

Everywhere I see bliss, for which I
alone am irrevocably excluded.
--Mary Shelley (1797—1851)
English novelist.
_Frankenstein_ [1818]

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Alas! I have nor hope nor health,
Nor peace within nor calm around,
Nor that content surpassing wealth
The sage in meditation found,
And walked with inward glory crowned--
Nor fame, nor power, nor love, nor leisure.
Others I see whom these surround--
Smiling they live, and call life pleasure;
To me that cup has been dealt in another measure.
--Percy Bysshe Shelley (1792—1822)
English poet.
"Stanzas written in Dejection, near Naples" [December 1818]


No change, no pause, no hope! Yet I endure.
--Percy Bysshe Shelley (1792—1822)
English poet.
_Prometheus Unbound_, act I, l. 24.

-

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The mass of men lead lives of quiet desperation.
What is called resignation is confirmed desperation.
--Henry David Thoreau (1817—1862)
American essayist, poet, and practical philosopher.
_Walden_ [1854] "Economy"

& see:

Nowadays men lead lives of noisy desperation.
--James Thurber (1894—1961)
American humorist and cartoonist.

-

-----

slough (noun) ['slu (US), 'slaw (Britain)]
1: A swamp, marsh, tidal flat, or bog at the inlet of a river; a muddy backwater.
2: Deep moral degeneration or despair.




DESTINY

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Note: The hippo story (above) is apocryphal.

see: "ACCIDENT"
see: "CHANCE"
see: "CIRCUMSTANCES"
see: "LIFE"
see "ACTIONS" for other related links


Man is made by his belief. As he believes, so he becomes.
--The Bhagavad Gita (c. 5th c BC. — 2nd c AD.)
Hindu sacred text.

Destiny is not a matter of chance, it is a matter
of choice; it is not a thing to be waited for; it
is a thing to be achieved.
--William Jennings Bryan (1860—1925)
American Democratic and Populist politician
who ran for the presidency three times
without success.
In a speech in Washington, D.C., [22 February 1899].

Thoughts lead on to purpose, purpose leads on to
actions, actions form habits, habits decide character,
and character fixes our destiny.
--attributed to Tryon Edwards (1809—1894)
American theologian.

They who talk much of destiny, their birth-star, etc.,
are in a lower dangerous plane, and invite the evils
they fear.
--Ralph Waldo Emerson (1803—1882)
American philosopher and poet.
In Edmund Clarence Stedman _A Library of American Literature
from the Earliest Settlement to the Present_ [1888], p. 160.

We choose our joys and sorrows long before we experience them.
--Kahlil Gibran (1883—1931)
Lebanese poet.

What lies behind us and what lies before us are
tiny matters compared to what lies within us.
--Oliver Wendell Holmes, Sr. (1809—1894)
American physician, poet, and essayist.

Tu ne quaesieris, scire nefas, quem mihi, quem tibi
Finem di dederint.
(Do not try to find out — we're forbidden to know —
what end the gods have in store for me, or for you.)
--Horace [Quintus Horatius Flaccus] (65—8 BC)
Roman poet.
_Odes_, bk. 1, # 11

That old miracle — Love-at-first-sight —
Needs no explanations.
The heart reads aright
Its destiny sometimes.
--Owen Meredith (pseudonym of Edward Bulwer-Lytton)
_Lucile_ p. 317

There is a mysterious cycle in human events. To some
generations much is given. Of others much is expected.
This generation of Americans has a rendezvous with
destiny.
--Franklin D. Roosevelt (1882—1945)
American Democratic statesman and President [1933—1945].
In his acceptance speech at the Democratic Party National
Convention [June 1936].

-

The fault, dear Brutus, is not in our stars,
But in ourselves, that we are underlings.
--William Shakespeare (1564—1616)
English dramatist.
_Julius Caesar_ [1599]


Look what is done cannot be now amended:
Men shall deal unadvisedly sometimes,
Which after-hours gives leisure to repent.
--William Shakespeare (1564—1616)
English dramatist.
_King Richard III_ [c. 1592—1593]

-

There are today two great peoples on the earth who,
setting off from different points of departure, seem
to be advancing towards the same goal: they are the
Russians and the Anglo-Americans ... Each of them
seems to be summoned by a secret plan of
Providence one day to hold in its hands the
destinies of half the world.
--Alexis de Tocqueville (1805—1859)
French historian and politician.
_Democracy in America_ [1835] bk I, pt. 2, ch. 10.

How weak people are! How they simply accept what
happens, as if there were such a thing as destiny,
and not just a life to be grappled with.
--Fay Weldon (1931— )
British novelist.
_The Life and Loves of a She Devil_

The day we fashion Destiny,
our web of Fate we spin.
--John Greenleaf Whittier (1807—1892)
American poet.
"The Crisis" [1848]

-

Sow a thought, reap an act;
Sow an act, reap a habit;
Sow a habit, reap a character;
Sow a character, reap a destiny.
--anon.
(variously attributed to George Dana Boardman, the younger, Charles Reade,
and William Makepeace Thackeray.)

& note:

For whatsoever a man soweth,
that shall he also reap.
--Bible
"Galatians" 6:7

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DETERMINATION

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see: "DECISION"
see: "RESOLUTION"
see "EMOTIONS & FEELINGS" for other related links
see "SUCCESS" for other related links


Consider the postage stamp, my son. It secures
success through its ability to stick to one
thing till it gets there.
--Josh Billings [Henry Wheeler Shaw] (1818—1885)
American humorist.

And though hard be the task,
'Keep a stiff upper lip.'
--Phoebe Cary (1824—1871)
American poet.
"Keep a Stiff Upper Lip"

I will fight for what I believe in until I drop
dead. And that's what keep you alive.
--Barbara Castle (1910—2002)
British Labour politician.
In "Guardian" [14 January 1998].

History has demonstrated that the most notable
winners usually encountered heartbreaking obstacles
before they triumphed. They won because they refused
to become discouraged by their defeats.
--Robert (Bertie) Charles Forbes (1880—1954)
Scottish-born American jounalist, financier,
and the founder of "Forbes" [magazine].

I have not yet begun to fight.
(as his ship was sinking [23 September 1779],
having been asked whether he had lowered
his flag.)
--John Paul Jones (1747—1792)
Naval captain.
In Mrs Reginald De Koven
_Life and Letters of John Paul Jones_ [1914].

Obstacles cannot crush me. Every obstacle yields
to stern resolve. He who is fixed to a star does
not change his mind.
--Leonardo da Vinci (1452—1519)
Florentine painter, sculptor, musician, and scientist.

You've got to get up every morning with
determination if you're going to go to
bed with satisfaction.
--George Lorimer (1869—1937)
American editor of "The Saturday Evening Post."

^

Stick to your own gifts; insist upon your
own talent; be absolutely loyal to yourself;
don't let others tempt or persuade you to
abandon the calling your soul tells you is
yours. Be true to your own convictions if
you hope to develop the progress in life.

The thought, dreams and inspirations that
come to you are yours — they belong to
you by the law that governs your particular
existence. The dreams and aspirations
someone else has for you do not belong to
you if they conflict with what your intuition
tells you is your calling. Don't try to adjust
your eyes to another; you can't do it.

--B.J. [Bartlett Joshua] Palmer (1881—1961)
American pioneer of Chiropractic.

^

-

kap posts to USENET in 1998:

When we bought a new Kia in September of '96, I thought it would
be a good idea for Margaret to have a cell phone when she went to
work. You see, the car was too new to be reviewed by 'Consumer
Reports', and we really didn't know if it would break down or run.
Needless to say, the car did fine and we never had occasion to use
the cell phone for the intended purpose.

In 15 months I used the phone 4 times. Once to call my daughter
from a restaurant in a casino (which I thought was pretty cool.)
Once to call my daughter from the pool at our apartment (which
I also thought was pretty cool.) And twice on a long Sunday
morning bike ride (some Sunday mornings I only go one way,
call Margaret, and have her pick me up in the aforementioned
Kia.) Now I suppose I could have called Margaret from any one
of the 736 7-11's around town, but that wouldn't be nearly as
cool as calling from a cell phone.

So in 15 months @ $20 a month the charge was approximately
$300 (plus the calls) Each cool call cost me $75.

Being of quick mind, I decided to cancel the cell phone. (In fairness
to myself, I should explain that I signed a contract for a year, so I
couldn't have cancelled before Sept. '97.) Anyway, Christmas Eve I
got on the phone with AT&T. With a determination rarely seen
around these parts, I picked up the phone and with a steady
finger dialed 1-888-whatever.

Do you know what the message asks first?

"If you want to hear this message in English, press 1, now"

I'm thinking, "We are in the United States, aren't we?"

After pressing a few more buttons, a guy comes on the line, and
without any sales pressure whatsoever, asks, "Why are you
cancelling?" And I tell him.

He says, "Would you be interested in the $9.95 plan."

"I don't know, what's that?"

He explains.

And I swear to God, this is what I said. "Well, I was paying $20 for
not using the phone, and now I'll only be paying $10 for not using
the phone, so sign me up."

Margaret was in the bathroom during the conversation, and when
she came out she asked me if the phone was now cancelled.

"Kinda cancelled," I said.

Margaret said something about the guy laughing his ass off, and
something about me being dumb, or words to that affect. She might
have called me a dumbass, or said she was going to break my ass,
but the words "dumb" and "ass" were definitely used.

She called back, and with determination more resolute than mine,
cancelled the phone.

--kap

-

Far better it is to dare mighty things, to win glorious triumphs,
even though checkered by failure, than to rank with those poor
spirits who neither enjoy much nor suffer much, because they
live in the gray twilight that knows not victory nor defeat.
--Theodore Roosevelt (1858—1919)
American Republican statesman and President [1901—1909].
Speech before the Hamilton Club, Chicago, Illinois [10 April 1899].

A thing seriously pursued affords true enjoyment.
--Lucius Annaeus Seneca (4 B.C.— 65 A.D.)
Roman philosopher and poet.
_Epistles_, XXIII, 3, 4

I must keep on rowing, not until I reach
port but until I reach my grave.
--Germaine de Staλl (1766—1817)
French writer.
_Letter to Albertine Necker de Saussure_ [July 1814].

^

A Northern Virginia housewife was hosting a reception in late
summer of 1975 to raise money for a local congressional
candidate, Joe Fisher. A few minutes before the scheduled
starting time, a pleasant-looking stranger rang her doorbell.

"Good afternoon," he said. "My name's Jimmy Carter. I heard
you're having a political event here today, and wondered what
I could do to help."

The accent was Deep South — too rich for Arlington, Va., the
party-giver knew. Still, the fellow seemed so ingratiating. If
she felt flustered, it was only for a moment.

"Well, since you ask, I'm afraid we are a little short of ice for
the number of guests we're expecting. Do you suppose ... ?"

"Don't give it another thought," Jimmy Carter said, and he was
off — to return with four bags of ice cubes and a chance to present
himself to the afternoon's guests as a yet unknown candidate
for president.

--Lionel Van Deerlin
"Presidential Speculation is Probably Pointless"
Copley News Service [8 December 2006]

^

-----

inexorable [in-EK-sur-uh-bul], adjective:
Not to be persuaded or moved by entreaty or prayer; firm;
determined; unyielding; unchangeable; inflexible; relentless.
Ex.: "But the idea of providence, whether the biblical version
or the Enlightenment's or Marx's, is at bottom a tragic
notion, for it implies that individual human choices count
for nothing against the weight of an inexorable,
overwhelming force, whether benign or cruel, whether known
as God, History, Destiny, Progress or DNA."
--James Carrol, "Laughing Our Way to Defeat,"
_New York Times_ [16 February 1986]

resolve (verb) [ree-'zalv]
To firmly commit oneself, as to resolve to quit smoking;
Usage: Resolve may be used as a verb or a noun. As a
noun it means "commitment, firm intent," e.g. He undertook
the new job with great resolve.

stymie (verb)
Hinder or prevent the progress or accomplishment of.
Synonyms: blockade, obstruct, embarrass, hinder



DEVIL'S ADVOCATE

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.

see "COMMUNICATION" for related links


He that wrestles with us strengthens our nerves and
sharpens our skill. Our antagonist is our helper.
--Edmund Burke (1729—1797)
Irish-born Whig politician and man of letters.
_Reflections on the Revolution in France_ [1790]

No honest man will argue on every side.
--Sophocles (496?—406 B.C.)
Greek dramatist.



DIARIES

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.

see: "SECRETS"
see "COMMUNICATION" for other related links


In Hollywood now when people die they don't say,
"Did he leave a will?" but "Did he leave a diary?"
--Liza Minelli (1946— )
American singer and actress.
_Observer_ [13 August 1989]

I always say, keep a diary and
some day it'll keep you.
--Mae West (1893—1980)
American stage and film actress.
_Every Day's a Holiday_ [1937 film]

I never travel without my diary. One should
always have something sensational to read
in the train.
--Oscar Wilde (1854—1900)
Anglo-Irish dramatist and poet.
_The Importance of Being Earnest_ [1895]



DICKENS (CHARLES)

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.

see "PEOPLE" for related links


I never could have done what I have done without the
habits of punctuality, order, and diligence, without the
determination to concentrate myself on one subject at
a time.
--Charles Dickens (1812—1870)
English novelist.
In Michael E. Ruge
_Quote-a-quote: To Your Success..._, p. 42 [2005].

No one thinks first of Mr. Dickens as a writer. He is at once,
through his books, a friend. He belongs among the intimates of
every pleasant-tempered and large-hearted person. He is not so much
the guest as the inmate of our homes. He keeps holidays with us, he
helps us to celebrate Christmas with heartier cheer, he shares at
every New Year in our good wishes: for, indeed, it is not in his
purely literary character that he has done most for us, it is as a
man of the largest humanity, who has simply used literature as the
means by which to bring himself into relation with his fellow-men.
--Charles Eliot Norton (1827—1908)
American scholar.
In _North American Review_ [April 1868].

In its attitude towards Dickens the English public has always been a
little like the elephant which feels a blow with a walking-stick as a
delightful tickling. ... Dickens seems to have succeeded in attacking
everybody and antagonising nobody.
--George Orwell [Eric Blair] (1903—1950)
English novelist.
_Charles Dickens_

-

"New Yorker" cartoon, publisher to author:

"Come now, Mr Dickens; it must have been either the best of
times or the worst of times. It could hardly have been both!"

-


end page



| DANCING - DAY | DEATH - PAGE 1 (A-G) | DEATH - PAGE 2 (H-Z) | DEBATE - DEEDS | DECEPTION | DEFEAT - DELAY | DEMOCRACY | DENIAL - DESIRE | DESPAIR - DICKENS (CHARLES) | DICTIONARY - DILIGENCE | DINNER - DISABILITY | DISAGREEMENT - DISGUISE | DISHONESTY - DOCTORS | DOGS | (ON) DOING GOOD - DREAMS | DRESS - DRUNKENNESS | DUELS - DUTY |
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