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CANCER
CANDOR --- CANNIBALS
CANOE --- CAN'T WIN --- CAPITAL PUNISHMENT

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CANCER

see: "HEALTH" for related links


The three most beautiful words in the English
language are not "I love you." They are: "It
is benign."
--Woody Allen [Allen Stewart Konigsberg] (b. 1935)
American actor, screenwriter, and director.
_Deconstructing Harry_ [1998 film]

The truth is, if you asked me to choose between
winning the Tour de France and cancer, I would
choose cancer. Odd as it sounds, I would rather
have the title of cancer survivor than winner of
the Tour, because of what it has done for me as
a human being, a man, a husband, a son, and a
father.
--Lance Armstrong (b. 1971)
American cyclist, seven time winner of the Tour de France.
_It's Not about the Bike: My Journey Back to Life_ [2000]

"There are funny things about cancer," she told People
magazine, "Really there are." Her daughter once walked
into the bathroom moments after [Linda] Ellerbee stepped
out of the shower. "There I was with no breasts and no
hair ...Vanessa looked at me, smiled and said, 'Momma,
you look just like Buddha — only without the wisdom.'
--'Hall of Fame', Cancer Research and Treatment Fund website.
(Linda Ellerbee (b. 1944), American journalist.)

-

Cancer is so limited ...
It cannot cripple love,
It cannot shatter hope,
It cannot corrode faith,
It cannot destroy peace,
It cannot kill friendship,
It cannot suppress memories,
It cannot silence courage,
It cannot invade the soul,
It cannot steal eternal life,
It cannot conquer the spirit.
--anon.



CANDOR

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see: "DECEPTION"
see: "HONESTY"
see: "SECRECY"
see: "SINCERITY"
see: "TRUTH"


To think all you say, is but candor;
To say all you think, would be slander.
--William Allingham (1824—1899)
Irish man of letters and poet.
_Blackberries Picked Off Many Bushes_ [1884]

But of all plagues, good Heaven, they wrath can send,
Save, save, oh! save me from the Candid Friend!
--George Canning (1770—1827)
British statesman; prime minister [1827].
"New Morality" in _Anti-Jacobin_ [9 July 1798]. (wikiquote)

Straightforwardness, without the rules of propriety, becomes rudeness.
--Confucius (551—479 B.C.)
K'ung Ch'iu, Chinese philosopher.
_The Confucian Analects_

Blame where you must, be candid where you can,
And be each critic the Good-natured Man.
--Oliver Goldsmith (1728—1774)
Anglo-Irish writer, poet, and dramatist.
_The Good-Natur'd Man_ [1768]

Candor is the brightest gem of criticism.
--Isaac D'Israeli (1766—1848)
English author and the father of Benjamin Disraeli.
_Curiosities of Literature_ [3 vols., 1813]
Quoted in _The Knickerbocker_ [December 1833].

He who, when called upon to speak a disagreeable truth, tells
it boldly and has done, is both bolder and milder than he who
nibbles in a low voice, and never ceases nibbling.
--Johann Kaspar Lavater (1741—1801)
Swiss writer, Protestant pastor, and founder of physiognomics.
_Aphorisms on Man_ [2nd ed., 1789]

There is but one way I know of conversing safely with all men;
that is, not by concealing what we say or do, but by saying or
doing nothing that deserves to be concealed.
--Alexander Pope (1688—1744)
English poet.
Letter to H. Cromwell, Esq. [28 October 1710].



Click picture to ZOOM
CANNIBALS

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see: "FOOD & DRINK" for related links

^

From _With the Flag on the Seven Seas: Fifty Years a Seafarer_
by Admiral Sir Bulwark Bloode [1907] —

The Pacific Station had its ups and downs. My first mission
when I took command of the "Myrmidon" was to track down
some Solomon Islanders who had eaten a Quaker missionary.
By all accounts he was a strange fellow who did not drink nor
eat meat and walked around barefoot. It seems he stuck his
nose into some native war and got eaten for his troubles. The
poor devil was wrapped in palm leaves, parboiled in salt water
and then lightly grilled.
--_The Folio Book of Humorous Anecdotes_
Introduced by Edward Leeson [2005], "Food, Drink and Entertaining"

^

When they sacrifice a wretched Indian they saw
open the chest with stone knives and hasten to tear
out the palpitating heart and blood and offer it to
their idols in whose name the sacrifice is made. Then
they cut off the thighs, arms and head and eat the
former at feasts and banquets, and the head they
hang up on some beams; the body of the man is not
eaten but given to their fierce animals.
--Bernal Diaz del Castillo (c. 1498—c. 1568)
Spanish historian.
_The Conquest of New Spain_ [c. 1560], vol. 2 [1910 ed.]

As the natives got ready to serve
A midget explorer named Merve;
'This meal will be brief,'
Said the cannibal chief,
'For this is at best an hors d'oeuvre.'
--attributed to Ed Cunningham

Most vigitaryans I iver see looked enough like
their food to be classed as cannybals.
--Finley Peter Dunne (1867—1936)
American journalist and humorist.
_Mr Dooley's Philosophy_ "Casual Observations" [1900]

Know that in one province of our country is a wilderness and that
there live horned men who have but one eye in front and three or
four in the back. There are also women who look similar. We have
in our country still another kind of men who feed only on raw flesh
of men and women and do not hesitate to die. And when one of
them passes away, be it their father or mother, they gobble him
up without cooking him. They hold that it is good and natural
to eat human flesh and they do it for the redemption of their sins.
This nation is cursed by God and it is called Gog and Magog
and there are more of them than of all other peoples. With the
coming of Antichrist they will spread over the whole world,
for they are his friends and allies.
--One of the forged Prester John's letters [c. 12th-14th cent.)
Legendary Christian ruler of the East.


Is it progress if a cannibal uses knife and fork?
--Stanislaw Jerzy Lec (1909—1966)
Polish writer.
_Unkempt Thoughts_ [1962]

^

Packer, Alfred (1842—1907)
American gold prospector.

In 1873, in Utah, Alfred Packer and some friends went on a gold
prospecting trip. The weather proved too difficult, and most of
the party went home. Packer and six men continued on into the
mountains. But it was Packer alone who returned, insisting he
had been deserted by his friends, of whom there was no trace.
He claimed he had subsisted on roots and small game, but he
looked rosy and flush indeed. It was not long before the half-
eaten bodies of his companions were found, and Packer
confirmed that in a dispute he had killed and consumed them
all. As he was sentenced to death, the judge said to him,
"Alfred Packer, you depraved Republican cannibal — there
were only six Democrats in Hinsdale County and, by God,
you've et five of them!"

--_Bartlett's Book of Anecdotes_
edited by Clifton Fadiman and Andrι Bernard [2000 ed.]

^

[To a student who had been trekking in Papua New Guinea:]
You managed not to get eaten, then?
--Prince Philip, Duke of Edinburgh (b. 1921)
Consort of Queen Elizabeth II.
Quoted in Barbara Karg, Rick Sutherland, & Lucie Cave
_The World's Stupidest Celebrities_ [2008]

These [Maori] are the only people who kill their
fellow creatures purely for the meat, which we are
well assured they do by laying in wait for one
another as a sportsman would for his game ... carrying
in their ears the thumbs of those unhappy sufferers.
--Journal of Richard Pickersgill [January 1770] in
J.C. Beaglehole (ed.) _The Journals of Captain James Cook:
The Voyage of the Endeavour 1768-1771_ [1955].

We went over a great hye mountain as strait as stair
steps in snow up to our knees ... the Bears took the
provision the men had cashed and we had but very
little to eat ... Some of the compana was eating them
that died ... 3 died and the rest eat them. Thay was
11 day without any thing to eat but the Dead ... O Mary
I have not rote you half of the truble we have had but
I have rote you anuf to let you now that you don't now
what truble is but thank god we have all got throw and
the only family that did not eat human flesh.
--Virginia Reed, aged 12, to Mary Keyes [16 May 1847],
in George R. Street _Ordeal by Hunger_ [1960 ed.] pp.360-61.
In M.J. Cohan and John Major {eds.}
_History in Quotations_, p. 578 [2004].
Cohan & Major add:
The child describes the ordeal of the Donner Party in
its westward crossing of the Sierra-Nevada Mountains
between Nov. 1846 and April 1847.

I ate his liver with some fava beans
and a nice chianti.
--Ted Tally (b. 1952)
American playwright and screenwriter.
Screenplay _The Silence of the Lambs_ [1991 film]

They listened with the greatest of interest to
everything he had to say. And then they ate him.
--Mark Twain [Samuel Langhorne Clemens] (1835—1910)
American humorist, novelist, journalist, and river pilot.
Recounting the fate of a young missionary sent to work a
mong cannibals; (quotation cited by Nichole Hollander in
a New York Times Book Review article on Linda Ellerbee's
book _And So It Goes_, in which the quote appeared.)

-

Missionary: A man chosen to give ferocious
cannibals their first taste of religion.

Missionary: A man who teaches cannibals
to say grace before they eat him.

-



Click picture to ZOOM
CANOE

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Photograph: Canoeing in the Adirondacks

see: "ENTERTAINMENT, HOBBIES, & LEISURE ACTIVITIES" for related links
see: "NATURE" for related links


A Canadian is somebody who knows
how to make love in a canoe.
--Pierre Berton (1920—2004)
Canadian writer.
In "The Canadian" [22 December 1973].

-

When you get out on one of those lakes in a canoe
like this, you do not forget that you are completely
at the mercy of the wind, and a fickle power it is.
The playful waves may at any time become too rude
for you in their sport, and play right over you.
--Henry David Thoreau (1817—1862)
American essayist, poet, and practical philosopher.
“The Allegash and East Branch” [1864] in _The Maine Woods_ [1864],
in _The Writings of Henry David Thoreau_, vol. 3, Houghton Mifflin [1906].


It is wonderful how well watered this country is....
Generally, you may go any direction in a canoe, by
making frequent but not very long portages.
--Henry David Thoreau (1817—1862)
American essayist, poet, and practical philosopher.
“The Allegash and East Branch” [1864] in _The Maine Woods_ [1864],
in _The Writings of Henry David Thoreau_, vol. 3, Houghton Mifflin [1906].


After this rough walking in the dark woods it was
an agreeable change to glide down the rapid river
in the canoe once more.... It was very exhilarating,
and the perfection of traveling, quite unlike floating
on our dead Concord River, the coasting down this
inclined mirror, which was now and then gently winding,
down a mountain, indeed, between two evergreen forests,
edged with lofty dead white pines, sometimes slanted
half-way over the stream, and destined soon to bridge
it. I saw some monsters there, nearly destitute of
branches, and scarcely diminishing in diameter for
eighty or ninety feet.
--Henry David Thoreau (1817—1862)
American essayist, poet, and practical philosopher.
“The Allegash and East Branch” [1864] in _The Maine Woods_ [1864],
in _The Writings of Henry David Thoreau_, vol. 3, Houghton Mifflin [1906].

-

-----

pirogue (noun)
A canoe made from a hollowed-out tree trunk,
used especially in southern Louisiana.




CAN'T WIN

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see: "FUTILITY"
see: "LIFE" for related links


But Jesus, when you don't have any money, the
problem is food. When you have money, it's sex.
When you have both, it's health, you worry about
getting ruptured or something. If everything is
simply jake then you're frightened of death.
--J. P. Donleavy (b. 1926)
American dramatist and novelist.
O'Keefe, in _The Ginger Man_, ch. 5 [1955].

[Of Calvinism:]
You will be damned if you do — and
you will be damned if you don't.
--Lorenzo Dow (1777—1834)
American Methodist minister.
_Reflections on the Love of God_ch. VI [1836]

Whichever way we look the prospect is disagreeable. Behind, we
have left pleasures we shall never more enjoy, and therefore regret;
and before we see pleasures which we languish to possess, and are,
consequently, uneasy till we possess them.
--Oliver Goldsmith (1728—1774)
Anglo-Irish writer, poet, and dramatist.
_The Citizen of the World_, Letter XLIV [1762]


^

Nathaniel Hawthorne (1804—1964)
American novelist.

In March 1864, an ill Hawthorne was traveling with
his old friend and publisher James Ticknor. Driving
through Philadelphia, the bad weather turned even
colder and rainier. Ticknor took off his coat and put
it around Hawthorne's shoulders to protect him. It
helped Hawthorne — but Ticknor caught a severe
case of pneumonia and died a few days later.

--_Bartlett's Book of Anecdotes_
edited by Clifton Fadiman and Andrι Bernard [2000 ed.]

^

To have money is a feare, not to have it a griefe.
--George Herbert (1593—1633)
English religious poet.
_Jacula Prudentum_ (Outlandish Proverbs) [1640]

But there, everything has its drawbacks, as the man said
when his mother-in-law died, and they came down upon
him for the funeral expenses.
--Jerome K Jerome (1859—1927)
English novelist and playwright.
_Three Men in a Boat_, ch. 3 [1889]

If these writings of the Greeks agree with the book of God,
they are useless and need not be preserved; if they disagree,
they are pernicious and ought to be destroyed.
--Caliph Omar (581—644)
Muslim caliph.
Attributed remark after burning the Alexandrian Library in 642.



CAPITAL PUNISHMENT

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see: "CRIME & PUNISHMENT" for related links


I was courtmartialled in my absence and sentenced to
death in my absence, so I said they could shoot me in
my absence.
--Brendan Behan (1923—1964)
Irish poet, novelist, and playwright.
_The Hostage_, act I [1958]

Here richly, with ridiculous display,
The Politician's corpse was laid away.
While all of his acquaintance sneered and slanged
I wept: for I had longed to see him hanged.
--Hilaire Belloc (1870—1953)
British poet, essayist, historian, and novelist.
"Epitaph on the Politician Himself"

^

Alexander Blackwell (1709—1749)
British adventurer.

Sentenced to be decapitated, Blackwell came
to the block and laid his head on the wrong
side. The executioner pointed out his mistake.
Blackwell moved around to the correct side,
observing that he was sorry for the mistake,
but this was the first time that he had been
beheaded.

--_Bartlett's Book of Anecdotes_
edited by Clifton Fadiman and Andrι Bernard [2000 ed.]

^

There, but for the grace of God, goes John Bradford.
--John Bradford (1510—1555)
English Protestant martyr.
While observing several criminals being taken to execution, in _The
Writings of John Bradford_ [1853]. Shortly thereafter, Bradford was
charged with sedition and heresy, and burned at the stake.

The Americans are a good-natured people,
kindly, helpful to one another, disposed to
take a charitable view even of wrongdoers. ...
Even a mob lynching a horse thief in the West
has consideration for the criminal, and will
give him a good drink of whiskey before he
is strung up.
--James Bryce (1838—1922)
British politician, diplomat, and historian;
ambassador to the U.S. [1907—1913].
_The American Commonwealth_ [1888]

Hanging is too good for him, said Mr. Cruelty.
--John Bunyan (1628—1688)
English writer and allegorist.
_The Pilgrim's Progress_ [1678] "Apology for His Book"

[The Queen of Hearts speaking:]
Off with her head!
--Lewis Carroll [Charles Lutwidge Dodgson] (1832—1898)
English writer and logician.
_Alice's Adventures in Wonderland_, ch. 8 [1865]

How about this for a headline for tomorrow's paper?
French fries.
--James French (1936—1966)
American convict.
Electrocuted in Oklahoma [1966].

I did not get my Spaghetti-O's, I got spaghetti.
I want the press to know this.
--Thomas J. Grasso, a convicted killer who was executed
March 20, 1995 in Oklahoma, commenting on his last meal's
falling short of his expectations.

-

To execute a murderer is simply to adopt his point of view.
--Sydney J. Harris (1917—1986)
American journalist.
_Pieces of Eight_ [1982]


One of the oldest Russian proverbs remains as
inexorably true in modern America: 'No one is
hanged who has money in his pocket.' Or, one
might say, capital punishment is only for those
without capital.
--Sydney J. Harris (1917—1986)
American journalist.In his sydicated column
"Chicago Daily News" [April 1971].

-

Depend upon it, Sir, when a man knows he is to
be hanged in a fortnight, it concentrates his mind
wonderfully.
--Samuel Johnson (1709—1784)
English poet, critic, and lexicographer.
In James Boswell _Life of Samuel Johnson_ [1791] "19 September 1777".

In that case, if we are to abolish the
death penalty, let the murderers take
the first step.
--Jean-Baptiste Alphonse Karr (1808—1890)
French novelist and journalist.
In "Les Guκpes" [January 1849].

-

The sentry who is inattentive will be killed.

The arrow-messenger who gets drunk will be
killed.

Anyone who harbors a fugitive will be killed.

The warrior who unlawfully appropriates booty
for himself will be killed.

The leader who is incompetent will be killed.

--Laws, late 12th and early 13th centuries;
in Michael Hoang _Genghis Khan_ [1988].

-

Hanging one scoundrel, it appears, does not deter the next.
Well, what of it? The first one is at least disposed of.
--H.L. (Henry Louis) Mencken (1880—1956)
American journalist and literary critic.
_The American Mercury_. vol. 16 [1929]

We do not correct the man we hang; we correct others by him.
--Michel Eyquem de Montaigne (1533—1592)
French moralist and essayist.
_Essais_ (Essays) [pub. 1580—1588] "Of the Art of Conversation"

7. The commoners will not be allowed to wear
cotton clothing, under pain of death ...
8. Only great noblemen and valiant warriors are
given licence to build a house with a second
storey; for disobeying this law a person receives
the death sentence ...
14. There is to be a rigorous law regarding
adulterers. They are to be stoned and thrown
into rivers or to the buzzards.
--Montezuma I (c.1398—1469)
Emperor of the Mexican people from 1440-1468.
In Michael E. Smith _The Aztecs_, p. 52 [1996].

[To the firing squad at his execution, 27 February 1902:]
Shoot straight you bastards. Don't make a mess of it.
--Harry "Breaker" Morant (1864—1902)
English-born Australian poet and soldier.
Quoted in Bill Hornadge _The Australian Slanguage_ [1980].

You tittle-tattlers, and those who listen to slander,
by my good will should all be hanged — the former
by their tongues, the latter by their ears.
--Titus Maccius Plautus (254—184 BC)
Roman comic dramatist.
_Pseudolus_, I. 5. 12.

First of all, then, Solon repealed all Draco's laws
because of their harshness and the excessively
heavy penalties they carried; the only exceptions
were the laws relating to homicide. Under the
Draconian code almost any offence was liable to
the death penalty, so that even those convicted
of idleness were executed, and those who stole
fruit or vegetables suffered the same punishment
as those who committed sacrilege or murder.
This is the reason why, in later times, Demades
became famous for his remark that Draco's code
was written not in ink but in blood. Draco himself,
when he was once asked why he had decreed the
death penalty for the great majority of offenses,
replied that he considered the minor ones deserved
it, and so for the major ones no heavier punishment
was left.
--Plutarch (A.D. 46?—119?)
Greek philosopher and biographer.
_Parallel Lives_ "Solon"
In M.J. Cohan and John Major {eds.} _History in Quotations_ [2004].

[On feeling the edge of the axe prior to his execution:]
'Tis a sharp remedy, but a sure one for all ills.
--Sir Walter Raleigh (c. 1552—1618)
English explorer and courtier.
In D. Hume _History of Great Britain_ [1754].

[When asked if he had a final request while facing the firing squad:]
Why yes, a bulletproof vest!
--James W. Rodgers (d.1960)

It would repel me less to be a hangman than a soldier, because
the one is obliged to put to death only criminals sentenced by
the law, but the other kills honest men who like himself bathe
in innocent blood at the bidding of some superior.
--George Santayana (1863—1952)
Spanish-born philosopher and critic.
_Persons and Places_ [1944] (entry written c. 1880)

The punishment of criminals should be of use;
when a man is hanged he is good for nothing.
--Voltaire (Franηois Marie Arouet) (1694—1778)
French writer and philosopher.
_Philosophical Dictionary_ [1764] "Civil Laws"

Executions, far from being useful examples to the survivors, have, I
am persuaded, a quite contrary effect, by hardening the heart they
ought to terrify. Besides, the fear of an ignominious death, I believe,
never deterred anyone from the commission of a crime, because in
committing it the mind is roused to activity about present
circumstances.
--Mary Wollstonecraft (1759—1797)
English feminist.
_Letters Written During a Short Residence in Sweden,
Norway, and Denmark_, Letter 19 [1796]


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